What's the right etiquette

MrM

New member
ok, so here's a question:

What is the correxct thing to say when you are at a tournament, and someone comes up, smiles at you, and asks how the shooting is going (or in my case how my daughter's is going), and you haven't the foggiest who they are!
 

Tobytoolbag

New member
Fonz Awardee
ok, so here's a question:

What is the correxct thing to say when you are at a tournament, and someone comes up, smiles at you, and asks how the shooting is going (or in my case how my daughter's is going), and you haven't the foggiest who they are!
It's probably nothing, and they were probably just trying to be friendly, but there's two issues here, who the person is, and whether you should tell them.

In the first instance in your case, establishing who the person is is probably the over-riding concern - if they were enquiring about your daughter (whom, I'm assuming, is a Junior), you've got a perfect right to enquire (politely, of course) as to their identity, and why they're asking. You can't be too careful these days...:thumbsdow

As to whether you should tell them how well you (or your daughter) is getting on, it's up to you - it could be a bit of 'psychological warfare'; playing mind games so that you stop concentrating on what you're doing, and induce you to start worrying about how well your closest-ranked competitors are doing, thereby destroying your ability to keep putting 'em in the gold :thumbsdow ... It could also be a competitor worrying about how well you're doing. :cheerful:

Personally, once the identity of the person has been safely established, I'd refuse to get drawn into the 'mind games', and say something nondescript like, "Oh, getting on OK, thank you..", but not volunteer anything more specific. If they press you for scores, or suchlike, refer them to the Tournament Organiser, saying that you're not that bothered, and you've not actually looked...:raspberry
 

BillM

Member
You can deal with this in 2 ways. Firstly, just say "fine", smile and turn away and don't be drawn into conversation if you would prefer not to - it is in the 'Rules of Shooting' under Etiquette. Secondly, if you think as Tobytoolbag states, that the person is trying mind games then try something like the following based on my experience. I was shooting at a FITA some years ago and after my best scores at 90 & 70, a top archer came up to me just before we started the 50 distance and told me I was doing something wrong. I said that I knew and would deal with it in due course but he persisted in continuing to "coach" me despite my disinterest, result - missed the boss 5 out of the first 6 arrows and ended up with an extremely bad score. I'm sure that he was just well-meaning but it spoiled my day. I read in a magazine of a similar situation and how that person dealt with it. Likewise, if anyony tries it on with me the retort will be "Tell me, when you are on the shooting line at full draw - do you ever worry about breaking wind!"

Worth at try but if you ever get the chance to use it, please post the result so we can all benefit.

BillM
 

Dante

New member
Lie :cheerful:

Or in my case I could be truthful and honestly say I have no idea, because I do not look at the scores (totals) until the end.

Anyway 6 on the target is good for me, means I do not have any wet fletchings :D
 

Whitehart

Well-known member
Regardless of how I am shooting I always reply "Great" the last thing I need is somebody trying to make me think negatively and there is not much they can say back either. If asked a question about my shooting form or how I am doing something I reply "good it seems to be working for me and by the way it's not my problem - my subconcoius has it all under control".
 

MrM

New member
Ah, this was meant to have been a humerous post - just shows how words can be misinterpreted! Appreciate your concern Tobbs, but wasn't suggestinjg anything sinister - just loads of friendly parents who must know me and Sophie, but i've forgottern who they hell they are! It was more do you smile and pretend of course you know them, or look blank and vacant (which I am quite good at)
 

hypertigger

New member
i never give the full story unless it's someone i know really well.

if i couldn't remember for the life of me, then i'd just go "fine thank you" or something equally positively vague.
 
M

Moose

Guest
Blank and vacant

Blank and vacant stops them continuing the conversation and figuring out that when you replied you did not have the faintest idea of who is talking to you and how you know them
 

Furface

Moderator
Supporter
I get it all the time, though in reverse, with all sorts of long-lost friends chatting as if we'd met yesterday. My trouble is that I sometimes have difficulty remembering my daughter's name, let alone someone I havent't seen that morning. So I smile and try to pick up clues. Archers often have names on their shirts, or a club badge, and can often be induced to tell me their offspring's name (there are usually some) when I ask "How is diddleydoo?".
Of course, theer are also some who imprint themselves on the memory through sheer fear, when I remember I haven't provided the promised pony...
 

MrM

New member
Of course, theer are also some who imprint themselves on the memory through sheer fear, when I remember I haven't provided the promised pony...
:cheerful: Guess she'll have to make do with :cake3: next Sunday (clue - teenage years ahhh!)
 

jet186

New member
ok, so here's a question:

What is the correxct thing to say when you are at a tournament, and someone comes up, smiles at you, and asks how the shooting is going (or in my case how my daughter's is going), and you haven't the foggiest who they are!
Just wing it ! say fine and you, then you put the conversation back onto them, if they don't want to tell you they'll disappear quicker than a shoplifter running away from a store tec:cheerful:
 

Tommy B

New member
If someone's playing mind games I'll ask them an innocent-sounding question, such as, "Do you look at the sight-pin then the target, or the target then the sight-pin?" That usually spoils their next end or two.
 

SVL

The American
Fonz Awardee
Ironman
American Shoot
ok, so here's a question:

What is the correxct thing to say when you are at a tournament, and someone comes up, smiles at you, and asks how the shooting is going (or in my case how my daughter's is going), and you haven't the foggiest who they are!
Well lets assume it is not mind games but somebody who has noticed that you and daughter are often at the same shoots as them and they just want to say hello and make conversation rather than sit in silence all day watch the shoot, as sometimes it is just like watching paint dry. You could just say hi, I did not know your daughter was shooting today, is she enjoying the shoot. My name is MrM I am sorry I don't know your name. I have no idea how the daughter is doing scorewise, but she is enjoying the competition.

If they are playing mind games this will work to your advantage if they are just being polite you may have gained a new friend to chat with while your daughter gets on with the shooting.

I have been shooting for 15 years now and know lots of archers, but am still hopeless on names. I know some AIUK members only by the AIUK name.
 

bkupris

Supporter
Supporter
American Shoot
AIUK Saviour
Just say "I dont know cause I don't look at the score until the round is finished".
 
J

John (OSF)

Guest
ok, so here's a question:

What is the correct thing to say when you are at a tournament, and someone comes up, smiles at you, and asks how the shooting is going (or in my case how my daughter's is going), and you haven't the foggiest who they are!
I'd just say 'she's coping so much better with people staring at her now' and ask if any of his kids were shooting that day. The shooting line is full of friendly people just being friendly people, but that said you've got to watch over your children at all times regardless.
 
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