Why we both love & hate 'muricans....

LionOfNarnia

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A friend in Florida, a non-archer, tagged me in this on FB. Reposting in its' entirety here, without comment, "just because" ;)

Around age 10 my dad got me one of those little badass compound bow beginner kits. Of course, the first month I went around our land sticking arrows in anything that could get stuck by an arrow. Did you know that a 1955 40 horse Farmall tractor tire will take 6 rounds before it goes down? Tough sumbich.

That got boring, so being the 10 yr. old Dukes of Hazard fan that I was, I quickly advanced to taking strips of cut up T-shirt doused in chainsaw gas tied around the end and was sending flaming arrows all over the place. One summer afternoon, I was shooting flaming arrows into a large rotten oak stump in our backyard. I looked over under the carport and see a shiny brand new can of starting fluid (Ether). The light bulb went off in my head.
I grabbed the can and set it on the stump. I thought that it would probably just spray out in a disappointing manner. Lets face it, to a 10 yr old mouth-breather like myself, (Ether), really doesn't "sound" flammable.
So, I went back into the house and got a 1 pound can of Pyrodex (black powder for muzzle loader rifles).
At this point, I set the can of ether on the stump and opened up the can of black powder. My intentions were to sprinkle a little bit around the (Ether) can but it all sorta dumped out on me. No biggie, a 1 lb. Pyrodex and 16 oz (Ether) should make a loud pop, kinda like a firecracker you know?
You know what? Screw that I'm going back in the house for the other can.
Yes, I got a second can of pyrodex and dumped it too. Now we're cookin'.
I stepped back about 15 ft and lit the 2 stroke arrow. I drew the nock to my cheek and took aim. As I released I heard a clunk as the arrow launched from my bow. In a slow motion time frame, I turned to see my dad getting out of the truck...OH SHIT! He just got home from work. So help me God it took 10 minutes for that arrow to go from my bow to the can. My dad was walking towards me in slow motion with a WTF look in his eyes. I turned back towards my target just in time to see the arrow pierce the starting fluid can right at the bottom. Right through the main pile of Pyrodex and into the can.
Oh Shit.
When the shock wave hit it knocked me off my feet. I don't know if it was the actual compression wave that threw me back or just reflex jerk back from 235 fricking decibels of sound. I caught a half a millisecond glimpse of the violence during the initial explosion and I will tell you there was dust, grass, and bugs all hovering 1 ft above the ground as far as I could see. It was like a little low to the ground layer of dust fog full of grasshoppers, spiders, and a worm or two.
The daylight turned purple. Let me repeat this... THE FRICKING DAYLIGHT TURNED PURPLE.
There was a big sweetgum tree out by the gate going into the pasture.
Notice I said "was". That son-of-a-bitch got up and ran off.
So here I am, on the ground blown completely out of my shoes with my Thundercats T-Shirt shredded, my dad is on the other side of the carport having what I can only assume is a Vietnam flashback:
ECHO BRAVO CHARLIE YOU'RE BRINGIN' EM IN TOO CLOSE!! CEASE FIRE. DAMNIT CEASE FIRE!!!!!
His hat has blown off and is 30 ft. behind him in the driveway. All windows on the north side of the house are blown out and there is a slow rolling mushroom cloud about 2000 ft. over our backyard. There is a Honda 185 3 wheeler parked on the other side of the yard and the fenders are drooped down and are now touching the tires.
I wish I knew what I said to my dad at this moment. I don't know – I know I said something. I couldn't hear. I couldn't hear inside my own head. I don't think he heard me either... not that it would really matter. I don't remember much from this point on. I said something, felt a sharp pain, and then woke up later. I felt a sharp pain, blacked out, woke later....repeat this process for an hour or so and you get the idea. I remember at one point my mom had to give me CPR. and Dad screaming "Bring Him back to life so I can kill him again". Thanks Mom.
One thing is for sure... I never had to mow around that stump again, Mom had been bitching about that thing for years and dad never did anything about it. I stepped up to the plate and handled business.
Dad sold his muzzle loader a week or so later. I still have some sort of bone growth abnormality, either from the blast or the beating, or both.
I guess what I'm trying to say is, get your kids into archery. It's good discipline and will teach them skills they can use later on in life.

~Author Unknown
 


4d4m

Member
Great story, but I'm calling fake. Pyrodex doesn't explode. Even black powder will only explodes if confined in a closed volume, and Pyrodex is a controlled-burn substitute for BP in muzzle loaders. A loose pile would burn quickly with a sorf of whumf and produce a lot of gas and smoke.

He might have lost his eyebrows and maybe got a flash burn but that's about it. Even that seems dubious at 15 feet away.
 


grndkntrl

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That copypasta "story" (and versions of it with variations in minor detail) has done the rounds on Reddit and loads of other social media sites & forums for many years. It's just a load of made up tosh.
 


chuffalump

Member
I once though petrol would make a good firestarter. Lucky none of the flaming paper fragments landed in anything flammable.

I used to have a XX75 shaft with a hole melted in it from using an exploding target. Think I've chucked it now.

Still have my fingers and eyebrows.
 


Rik

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....
Still have my fingers and eyebrows.
"... They're in a box somewhere in the spare room..."

When I think of some of the things I did as a kid... It's kind of lucky I didn't have more access to explosives. (observation: you can empty the contents of plastic caps, with care and a pin. Trying to grind the results into a powder with a stone, in a dish, is contra-indicated...)
 


Kernowlad

Member
My wife has distant relatives in the Outback of Australia. We visited in 1999 and it was proper Redneck style with guns everywhere, roo shooting, etc.
The farmer needed to move a tree so used the handy explosive that every proper farmer has; not sure which one but clearly it was powerful; he decided to blow the tree up and was a little surprised when the entire tree took off skywards and landed very, very close to him. There was still a sizeable crater there.

No worries with overshooting; their small farm is 3600 acres. But replace ticks with potentially deadly king brown snakes and a saunter outside suddenly feels a bit risky.
 


albatross

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One of my cousins and a friend of his decided to see what happens when you mix fertilizer with sugar. His friend lost one of his hands - but my cousin was just far enough away to escape serious injury.
 


LionOfNarnia

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It works both ways...

Many, many moons ago I made some gunpowder - took two Bunsen burners to even make it fizzle :(

(That's what happens when you use 15% sulphur 10% carbon)

Had more success with thermite though - blasted a crucible lid straight through the ceiling of the 6th form science lab!
 


Corax67

Active member
Life before arrows (my yoof) - air rifles and aerosol cans / fluorescent tubes / gas canisters featured regularly plus light bulb mortars from coke cans & lighter gas

How i made half a century I will never know 😁


Karl
 


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